Marvel Zombies vs Army of Darkness Review

Marvel Zombies vs Army of Darkness Review

“Talee-hoooe!” I’ve swung into another be-zonkers comic adventure! I just walked out of Cosmic Comics! and beat up some little kid named Caillou. His beating yielded a copy of the hardcover trade Marvel Zombies vs. Army of Darkness, or as I like to call it “Bruce Campbell vs. Dead Pajama Homos.”

The Deadites like myselves will agree, the Army of Darkness integrity is held up sweetly in the way the story flows. Staples such as: Ash’s twins, Ash’s womanizing, Ash’s insulting, Ash’s know-it-all demeanor, and Ash’s continual struggle against the Necronomicon are all there.

Most of the Marvel characters drop like Elton John right from the get-go; it’s quite sad really. Wolverine had the healing factor of Patrick Swayze in this comic, yet Spider-man holds for a few frames (just because Stan Lee and Spider-Man have a had a secret romance for years I guess).

Who did the writers choose to be the Magic Johnson of this zombie attack?

Dazzler…Dazzler!

That’s right mofos….not Venom, Not She-hulk, Not Psylocke, Not Gambit! Dazzler! All because Bruce Campbells’ image licensing requires that even in the comics he has to get hot tail.

In final regards, I’d like to say there’s another hot girl super heroine involved in this story, but I forgot who it was. Sometimes in life we forget the names of many women who helped us into bed. It doesn’t mean we didn’t care. It just means Dr. Doom was playing in concert and he’s kinda like the David Bowie of Marvel. Once you see him, you can’t remember who opened. If you’re lost in those last sentences you need to get out more. So yea. I’m saying Dr. Doom is the only person who thought ahead to build a Anti-Zombie stronghold. Not only this, but he has the only hard copy of the Necronomicon left on earth. Perhaps it has the answer to Ash’s problems, perhaps not… Perhaps no matter how many dimensional portals or relationships you walk through, your just gonna end up waving your member at Zombies or Werewolves….

I enjoyed hanging out with Ash once again and I think you will too; however, it is unfortunate that no Marvel characters of any awesomeness got any of the spotlight (or any DC characters for that matter! WTF!).

This is Eryk Belmont saying “it’s a trick…get an ax” and for all you comic book junkies out there, #getyourfix at Cosmic Comics! in Las Vegas.

Written for Cosmic Comics! by Eryk Belmont, but originally posted on Nerd Junkies in February 2012.